Crazy Rap-Straight Up
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Crazy Rap - The Hit Crew
(Wait a minute' man
Hey' check this out' tell it
It was this blind man' right
Man' check this out-
It was this blind man' right
He was feelin' his way down
The street with this stick' right
Hey He walked past this fish
Market' you know what I'm sayin'
He stopped' he took a deep breath' he said'
Woooooo' good morning' ladies
You like that sh*t' man
Hey' man' I got a gang of that sh*t' man
I tell you what- my man
On the guitar' fool on the drums'
Everybody just crowd around the mic'
I'll tell you all these mutha-f**kin' jokes
But first' I'ma start it off like this
Hey' help me sing it' homeboy )
Colt 45 and two Zig Zags' baby that's all we need
We can go to the park after dark'
Smoke that tumbleweed
And as the m*******a burns we can
Take our turns' singing them dirty rap songs
Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong'
Sell tapes from here to Hong Kong
So roll' roll' roll my joint Pick out the seeds and stems
Feelin' high as hell flyin' through Palmdale'
Skatin' on Dayton rims
So roll' roll the '83 Cadillac Coup de Ville
If my tapes and my cds just don't sell' I bet my caddy will
Well it was just sundown in a small white town
They call it Eastside Palmdale
When the Afroman walked through
The white land' houses went up for sale
Well' I was standin' on the corner sellin' rap
Cds when I met a little girl named Jan
I let her ride in my Caddy cause I didn't know
Her daddy was the leader of the Klu Klux Klan
We f**ked on the bed' f**ked on the flo'' f**ked
So long' I grew a f**kin' afro
Then I f**ked to the left' f**ked to the right
She sucked my dick 'til the sh*t turned white
I thought to myself' Sheba' Sheba
Got my a** lookin' like a ZEBRA
I pulled on my clothes and I was on my
Way' until her daddy pulled up in a Chevrolet
I ran I jumped out the back window' but
Her daddy' he was with waitin' a 2 x 4
Oh' he beat me to the left' he beat me to the right
The mutha-f**ker whooped my a** all night
But I ain't mad at her prejudiced dad' that's
The best damn p**sy I ever had
I got a bag of w**d and a bottle of wine
I'm a f**k that b**ch just one more time
Colt 45 and two Zig Zags' baby that's all we need
We can go to the park after dark' smoke
That tumbleweed
And as the m*******a burns we can take our
Turns' singing them dirty rap songs
Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong'
Sell tapes from here to Hong Kong
So roll' roll' roll my joint Pick out the seeds and stems
Feelin' high as hell flyin' through Palmdale' skatin'
On Dayton rims
So roll' roll the '83 Cadillac Coup de Ville
If my tapes and my cds just don't sell' I bet my caddy will
I met this lady in Hollywood She had green hair'
But damn she looked good
I took her to my house' cause she was fine' but
She whipped out a dick that was bigger than mine
I met this lady from Japan' never made love with an African
I f**ked her once' I f**ked her twice I ate that
P**sy like shrimp fried rice
Don't be amazed at the stories I tell ya
I met a woman in the heart of Australia
Had a big butt and big titties' too' so
I hopped in her a** like a kangaroo
See' I met this lady from Hawaii
Stuck it in her a**' and she said' Aiiiiieeee
Lips was breakfast' p**sy was lunch' then
Her titties busted open with Hawaiian Punch
Met Colonel Sander's wife in the state of Kentucky
She said' I'll fry some chicken if you just f**k me
I came in her mouth It was a crisis
I gave her my secret blend of herbs and spices
Colt 45 and two Zig Zags' baby that's all we need
We can go to the park after dark' smoke that tumbleweed
And as the m*******a burns we can take
Our turns' singing them dirty rap songs
Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and
Chong' sell tapes from here to Hong Kong
I met Dolly Parton in Tennessee
Her titties were filled with Hennesy
That country music nearly drove me crazy' but
I rode that a** and said' Yes' Miss Daisy
Met this lady in Oklahoma; put that p**sy in a coma
Met this lady in Michigan;
I can't wait 'til I f**k that b**ch again
Met a real black girl in South Carolina;
F**ked her 'til she turned into a white albino
F**ked this hooker in Iowa
I f**ked her on credit' so I owe her
F**ked this girl' down in Georgia; came in her mouth
Man' I thought I told ya
Met this beautiful sexy ho; she just ran
Cross the border of Mexico
Fine young thing' said her name's Maria
I wrapped her up just like a Hot Tortilla
I wanna get married' but I can't afford it
I know I'ma cry when she gets deported
Colt 45 and two Zig Zags' baby that's all we need
We can go to the park after dark' smoke that tumbleweed
And as the m*******a burns we can take
Our turns' singing them dirty rap songs
Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and
Chong' sell tapes from here to Hong Kong
So roll' roll' roll my joint Pick out the seeds and stems
Feelin' high as hell flyin' through Palmdale' skatin' on Dayton rims
So roll' roll the '83 Cadillac Coup de Ville
If my tapes and my cds just don't sell' I bet my caddy will
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