Everything You Know Is Wrong-Weird Al Yankovic
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[00:00.26]Everything You Know Is Wrong - Weird Al Yankovic (“怪人奥尔”扬科维奇)
[00:01.94]Written by:Al Yankovic
[00:03.00]
[00:09.98]I was driving on the freeway in the fast lane
[00:13.00]With a rabid wolverine in my underwear
[00:16.51]When suddenly a guy behind me in the back seat
[00:19.70]Popped right up and cupped his hands across my eyes
[00:22.08]I guessed Is it Uncle Frank or Cousin Louie
[00:24.87]Is it Bob or Joe or Walter
[00:27.14]Could it be Bill or Jim or Ed or Bernie or Steve
[00:30.05]I probably would have kept on guessing
[00:31.41]But about that time we crashed into the truck
[00:34.01]And as I'm laying bleeding there on the asphalt
[00:37.04]Finally I recognize the face of my hibachi dealer
[00:42.03]Who takes off his prosthetic lips and tells me
[00:45.76]Everything you know is wrong
[00:48.63]Black is white up is down and short is long
[00:51.66]And everything you thought was just so important doesn't matter
[00:57.16]Everything you know is wrong
[01:00.48]Just forget the words and sing along
[01:03.45]All you need to understand is
[01:06.11]Everything you know is wrong
[01:09.71]I was walkin' to the kitchen for some Golden Grahams
[01:13.04]When I accidentally stepped into a alternate dimension
[01:17.35]And soon I was abducted by some aliens from space
[01:19.56]Who kinda looked like Jamie Farr
[01:21.60]They sucked out my internal organs
[01:23.80]And they took some polaroids and said I was a darn good sport
[01:27.38]And as a way of saying thank you
[01:29.17]They offered to transport me back to any point in history that I would care to go
[01:33.59]And so I had them send me back to last Thursday night
[01:37.01]So I could pay my phone bill on time
[01:39.56]Just then the disembodied head of Colonel Sanders started yelling
[01:44.74]Everything you know is wrong
[01:48.10]Black is white up is down and short is long
[01:51.05]And everything you thought was just so important doesn't matter
[01:56.55]Everything you know is wrong
[02:00.04]Just forget the words and sing along
[02:03.20]All you need to understand is
[02:05.56]Everything you know is wrong
[02:08.57]
[02:44.91]I was just about to mail a letter to my evil twin
[02:48.51]When I got a nasty paper cut
[02:51.57]And well to make a long story short
[02:53.68]It got infected and I died
[02:55.84]So now I'm up in heaven with St. Peter by the pearly gates
[03:00.40]And it's obvious he doesn't like the Nehru jacket that I'm wearing
[03:05.03]He tells me that they've got a dress code
[03:08.12]Well he lets me into heaven anyway
[03:10.62]But I get the room next to the noisy ice machine for all eternity
[03:16.79]And every day he runs by screaming
[03:20.10]Everything you know is wrong
[03:23.54]Black is white up is down and short is long
[03:26.40]And everything you used to think was so important
[03:28.80]Doesn't really matter anymore
[03:30.61]Because the simple fact remains that
[03:32.08]Everything you know is wrong
[03:35.34]Just forget the words and sing along
[03:38.40]All you need to understand is that
[03:41.31]Everything you know is wrong
[03:42.74]Everything you know is wrong
[03:44.14]Everything you know is wrong
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